Friday, April 13, 2007

Waiting on the Wanting

I have always had to wait for the things that I want. It has been a great thing for me. Sometimes though, I think God wants me to have them sooner than the waiting period would be up, and He makes a way to give them to me early.

One time, I had been prayerfully looking for the best way to travel to South Africa. I thought, maybe I could volunteer, get work, or even move there. For almost 6 months I researched and hoped to find the best way to afford it. One day my longest life friend called me and asked me to go with her somewhere that required a stamp in my passport. I told her I could not because it was not in my budget. She paid my way for 16 days because it was so important to her. In return, I took all the photos (over 3000) and did whatever she asked me to do during the trip. It turned out to be one of the best times of my life, and I will never forget that God, through Mel, gave me something that would have taken me years to save up for.

Only this week a smaller but similar experience occurred. My birthday was on April 8. All I wanted was a new cell phone, but one with features that I could enjoy. Of course, they are too expensive and neither John nor I could justify the unnecessary expense. I accepted that we would need to wait several months, and I left it at that. 2 days later, I lost my cell phone. I had to replace it immediately because we were on the road and stuck in a hotel, so we I was able to do so that very day. In the end, I got the exact phone I wanted, but I did not pay anything close to the price we expected to pay. It had just dropped in price by half and came with a $50 rebate, and a free internet aircard worth $100 or more. My upgrade fees were waved because I had signed onto my internet account once. The next day, we received an unexpected bonus for 3x more than the cost of the phone. What would have cost us $600-800 only cost $150 to be billed at a later time, but the money is there when the bill comes.

These types of things happen to me all the time. I am certain it is because the Lord blesses those who wait.

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

One Year--give or take

They say that if you can make it through the first year of marriage you can make it through anything. I finally understand what everyone is talking about. John and I celebrated our 1st anniversary while on the road in the truck, so we did not actually get to do anything for it. I can say we deserve a pat on the back because we spent the first year of our marriage living within 3-4 feet from each other on a truck. It is definitely the way to immerse oneself and face every possible difference head on right away. I do not recommend this approach. Surely it is better to ease into all these things. What's the rush?

I will always highly recommend to people to date for as long as you feel is right, then have a decent engagement period to work out the things you will want to agree on once you are married. John and I did not do this. We were pals for 3 months, then dated for 3 months, then we eloped in 24 hours once we decided to be married. There was not any planning together or working through the differences. It would be so much better to come to those agreements while still in the "romantic" mode. We gave ourselves a whole 24 hours to go from broken up to married. There was not a whole lot of discussion about finances, living arrangements, employment, and so on and so forth. It changes the dynamics immediately once you are husband and wife and need to include and consider each other in everything. I do not recommend shock therapy in this but slow immersion.

The best advice I could give to people who are courting would be to take to heart the advice their loved ones are giving them. We hear all these trite phrases like, "you marry who you date." Or someone might tell you not to be in a hurry that marriage will come. You may also have been told that there is someone out there for everyone, you have all the time in the world, and whatever you do, Stick to your standards absolutely in your choice of marriage partner. All these people and all this advice are correct and GOOD. Believe it, listen to it, heed it and be happy that you have such great help available to you.

Marriage is not something to pursue out of desperation to pressure from friends, or church members, or because of age or loneliness. It is something to be open to but not in a rush to do. It is something to prepare for then fight for everyday for the rest of your life. It is something that does not come to a person easily but it can be lost swiftly.

PRAY TOGETHER DAILY!!!!!!!!!